THE SELF LOVE SMORGASBORD
Self-love. It’s a term that gets thrown around a lot these days. We all KNOW what it’s about, we all ‘get-it’… we freely tell other people that ‘they need to love themselves before they can love another’ but how many of us practice that and live from self-love on a regular basis?
How many of us take the time to figure out our own ‘self-love formula’? One that is completely unique to you and mixed with all the right ingredients for true, personal appreciation!
Self-love is not just about ‘feeling good’. Although, the act of practicing self-love does do that job well enough. Self-love, really, is a dynamic experience that changes, grows and moves with us as we change, grow and move. It builds out of the actions and thoughts we choose that, in turn, support us physically, psychologically, spiritually, and energetically.
As we move into a very sacred time of year I feel it’s so important and vital that we open up more and more to self-love.
It’ll be Christmas before you know it. Our lives our filled with gatherings, family time and celebrations. The New Year is about to roll on in and unless we take the time to wind down, reviewing and rest we’ll be back on – revving our engine and ploughing forward.
Press pause + practice self-love.
I wanted to share with you a few of the lessons from Week #7 in The Freedom Project. This lesson is all about building your own self-love practice.
The dare is on – can you embrace this time of year with a willingness to self-love?
Just a note: please don’t get caught up in ‘doing’ everything…not everything will be relevant to you at every stage. Some us our more time-poor than others. Some practices don’t resonate for each of us in the same way, or maybe starting slow + steady is the best way to build a strong self-love muscle for you.
So, pick and choose what is right for you and make a conscious effort to a create your own personal brand or formula of self-love… and, of course, include it into your life going forward!
The Self Love Smorgasboard
Rather than go into ‘overwhelm’ and control the experience of self love + nourishment, simply choose 1, 2 or more from the list below. Perhaps something that jumps out and chooses you?
Make the time and space to practice what you’ve chosen!
1. Forgiveness + compassion
Stop beating yourself up when you aren’t perfect! No one is, perfection doesn’t exist, remember? Consciously reframe thoughts and actions that are harsh an unfair towards yourself into a more gentle, compassionate, constructive an loving attitude. Forgive yourself and LIVE from a space of compassion. Not sometimes, always.
2. Saying no + setting boundaries
No one finds this easy, but let me tell you something so simple yet profound – learning how to say NO + set realistic emotional/physical boundaries is a game-changer. By not being available to perform and please everyone, all of the time, you are literally filling your self-love cup.
3. Protect yourself
We are all one. We are all energy. Which means that the energy and vibration of other people and experiences can easily be absorbed into your own energetic body. Protecting yourself is as much about being safe and sound as it is about keeping your energy field clear and clean. Detox yourself of toxic people, experiences and even habits! Consider getting some energy work done (reiki, kinesiology etc) to literally clean you up. Finally, make conscious effort not to ‘surrogate’ other people’s problems and dramas.
4. Prioritise yourself
Me, me, me! That’s your new mantra. You may have countless responsibilities – kids, work etc – that demand your full attention, but that doesn’t mean that you don’t count. It’s an old adage but you can’t fulfil your roles properly without fulfilling yourself. Check in with yourself daily + weekly and ask: have I put myself first at least ONCE today?
5. Self care; massage, facial, DIY beauty at home.
One of my favouite, and easiest ways to feel a little loved up. Book in a massage, pedi, facial. Or do something lavish at home. Every Sunday night I have a little beauty ritual – cleanse, exfoliate, face mask. Dry body scrub, add in a hair mask. Potter around the house (sometimes I get chores done) then shower. Coconut oil all over my body, moisturise my face and then read a book. All done in 1hr.
6. Going Slow + doing less
For me, putting my tools does is the most impactful way to experience love. Despite my list of things to do if I’m not ‘feeling good’ in the process (maybe I’m feeling run down, tired) I’ll drop my agendas, expectations and attachments and give myself permission to slow down. sometimes I have to compromise as some things have deadlines, but I’ll step away long enough to regroup. Often, in that moment I get perspective and can see that everything I am striving to do doesn’t really have to be done as and when I thought it did. The pressure is off.
7. Creativity + play
Creativity is freeing. Playing is the game of the soul. Do more of it, in any form that resonates. Maybe a monthly painting session? Maybe dance in your living room every evening with your kids. Swing away in a children’s playground.
8. Accept compliments + compliment yourself
Wake up each day an compliment yourself. ‘Claire, your skin looks great today’. Instead of ‘Wow, you look dog-tired!’. Better still, accept a compliment that comes your way ‘Oh, thank you, I needed to hear that!’
9. Be spontaneous
Break your routine, break the mould. Every week I try and get away from my desk for as much time a possible. I usually choose a Thurs or Friday, I might write blogs from a cafe, or spontaneously ditch my work and go to the beach. I try and book in something new and different for date night with the hubby (rock climbing, trapeze?) Or sometimes it just letting my intuition guide me towards YES when something’s presented to me out of the norm.
10. Daily meditation
Nothing creates clarity and connection with your true essence better than mediation. Meditate on and for love. Meditate for trust. Meditate because nothing else gives you a direct communication line to your soul.
11. Eat clean + Moving your body.
Nurture and replenish your body in a way it deserves. It works hard for you – it deserves fresh produce, water and intuitive movement. It doesn’t deserve to be bombarded with sugar, junk and hours of stagnancy.
13. In bed by 10pm Rise with the sun.
Sleep. The healer of all healers. Without it we are moody, bitchy zombies. Without it our body is in constant fight or flight mode, without it we can barely love ourselves let alone others. Make sleep your non-negotiable and allow nature’s rhythm to support you. Rise with the sun and take hold of your life with each new day. Squeeze the life out of life. That’s what your here to do, right?
14. Less online time
Except when you are doing The Freedom Project! Choose a social media free day/weekend, and stick to it. Connect heart to heart with others. Give your eyes and fingertips a break. Better still, disconnect from witnessing other people’s lives, an be a real-time witness to yours, instead.
15. Cleanse + clear your home: make room for the new.
Without space there is no way we can invite in the new- new people, relationships, experiences, manifestations. Detox your home. Chuck out stuff. Spring clean (in any season). Commit to less.
There you have it – a wide selection of ways to crack your heart open and love yourself silly. Within this sacred season make the time to get love-drink. You deserve it.
YOUR TURN: I want to know, what is your favourite way to practice self-love? Comment below!
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