One Woke Mama – The journey of awakening through motherhood
One Woke Mama – Episode 039 – Acknowledging Fear, Stress and Worry with Maria Golding.
Sometimes we are so deep into our fear and stress that we can’t see it and therefore can’t do anything about it.
It is the awareness of it, the simple acknowledgment of it that can create real shifts. As mamas we get lost in thee day-to-day, everything that ‘needs’ doing. If we can learn to acknowledge how we are feeling and shine the light of awareness, we might find real shifts and positive turns are possible.
This episode is from my private Om Mama Love membership – which is no longer running. I had the pleasure of chatting with Maria Golding – who is a leader on all things parenting, motherhood blending with spirituality and the latest in science.
Talking to Maria Golding is like being held, in a big warm mama embrace. It’s as if the divine mother herself in all her wisdom and love has you in her arms. Maria’s years of work with mamas comes through in our chat – you will really learn the power of acknowledgement and awareness and how this can create for a more beautiful, empowered and intuitive mama journey.
A few extra thoughts:
As mamas we are often in our head so much – planning, prepping, worrying, analysing, judging.
We can be filled with fear and joy all at the same time. Our body can retain stress leaving us feel tight and wound up. It’s not easy putting your all into another being – even if it’s the most fulfilling job on the planet. Truthfully though, all these fears, worry and stressors don’t aid us in anyway. It’s best we let them go.
That’s easier said than done, though, right? I remember noticing, once little S had arrived, how much MORE I was in my head than I had been for years. No amount of meditation or pre-baby self development work was going to shut up the ego voice of fear, worry and with that anxiety and stress.
It actually shocked me. I felt that all my ‘hard work’ on becoming more mindful and present actually had been totally lost. That I had ‘fallen apart’…
Until I remembered something powerful. These fears – this EGO suit that we put on that calls up to the surface all of the worries, concerns and what-ifs – are here to help us survive. We think and behave in this way because we MUST learn how to survive and copy. And becoming a mama is like going into battle – (maybe no where near as messy and painful!) it’s unknown and it can be confused and brutal at times. Our ego, and all the concerns it brings to the surface is simply just doing its job – protecting us (and our babies) and trying to survive in what is now a totally new world and existence.
So, with that remembrance I chose and still choose daily to not judge myself and to not get lost in disappointment. Instead I THANK my ego, I thank those fears and worries for showing up and keeping me diligent and focused but I quietly remind my fears that they can now dial right now. They are now allowed to take the back seat and switch gears (or even volume to a quiet hush in the background).
THE FOREGROUND INSTEAD BECOMES FILLED WITH PRESENCE, WITH CONSCIOUSNESS, WITH NON-REACTIONARY BEHAVIOUR, WITH REMEMBERING TO BREATHE AND PAUSE AND UNTANGLE FROM THE MESSY WEB OF MY MIND.
Moving out of fight, flight or freeze mode when our nervous system is on high alert, and choosing to enter a calmer, more relaxed state in body and mind we not only gently nudge those fears out of the limelight but we also create space for clarity, for positivity, for lateral thinking, for joy. When all of that can show up we can then tackle those fears and worries without getting lost in them.
That is just messy, uncomfortable, unhelpful.
We want peace, more often than not. We want to return to peace when we are caught up in fear, stress and worry. Peace is our innate nature and peace proves, again and again, to offer SO much more in running our lives.
SO WHEN YOU FIND YOURSELF MADLY TICKING THINGS OFF YOUR LIST TO DO, KNOW THIS, DEEP DOWN YOUR ACTUAL INTENTION IS TO SOOTHE THE ANXIETY WITHIN YOU. YOU ARE REALLY SEARCHING FOR PEACE, AREN’T YOU?
In that moment, perhaps try instead to ask yourself; “What would bring me into presence and call in more peace?” And do that instead. Or perhaps I should say BE that instead. The list will still be waiting for you later when you are ready to tackle it from a place of peace instead of anxiety.
Listen to Episode 039:
Beautiful one, thank you for being here and listening. It would mean the world to me if you would hit subscribe and stay connected to One Woke Mama – join me on this journey of awakening. Your feedback, comments, reviews and shares would always be gratefully received but also help us to reach more mamas who need support as they navigate the choppy waters of motherhood and all it asks of us. Love + light, Claire