A beautiful pregnancy
A beautiful pregnancy. I didn’t think I’d ever write those words… After the 7 weeks of utter crap I felt during the first trimester, I wasn’t sure the words ‘beautiful pregnancy’ would be thought, let alone said.
Once the fog of the first trimester cleared and the insane journey of transformation slowed down from full hustle to a nice cruising speed I started to tune in to the beauty of the experience unfolding with me.
The realisation that I am not only growing, building and soon-will-be birthing a baby, but that I am also birthing a mother really hit home for me.
How could this unreal, powerful, life-changing journey not be beautiful? Even with all the challenges that come with it, there is nothing more profound and stunning than the creation of life.
So today I wanted to share with you what I consider to be the beauty of my pregnancy for a few reasons.
Firstly, there are so many physical and emotional changes that unfold during pregnancy, many of which are not pleasant or fun (respect to EVERY woman who has ever carried a child). The amount of sacrifice that unfolds is insane – and I’m saying this at only 20 weeks! It’s because of this that I am choosing to make a conscious effort, daily, to see the beauty, the light, the gorgeousness of pregnancy – my god, there is so much to revel in and enjoy. But sometimes, on the off days, shitty stuff gets in the way.
The second reason I am sharing my beautiful pregnancy with you (through my eyes, obviously) is because I want to inspire those woman out there, like me, who might be overwhelmed by the thought of pregnancy yet feel that deep mother-earth pull to have a child, to see pregnancy through a different lens. One lined with silver (and gold!)
And finally, I hope that this post inspires you to take whatever it is that is challenging you right now and dissect it, put it back together and hopeful reform it into something beautiful.
Pleasing. Exciting. Joyful. In the rough is a diamond. Always.
A beautiful pregnancy
1) Spontaneous moments of emotion.
Erupting from within and pouring forth through tears, a choked voice. I feel overwhelmed with a deep sense of purpose, love and connection at random moments through my day. Sometimes a song will trigger it. Or reading a story of childbirth. Even a kind word from a friend. I am FEELING a lot more than ever before. Thinking – my normal way of being – isn’t coming so easily anymore.
2) Neurotic and irrational (mini) hormonal outbursts.
There is something WILD and FREE about feeling angry, or pissed off, or like you just want to stomp your feet and chuck a tantrum. These are very, very, rare for me – now and even before pregnancy – but I love them when they show up. They make me feel real. Human. Delicate. Vulnerable. And I always get something out of them. A release. A learning.
3) The miraculous and magical human body.
Think about it. Building a child is hard work! We are talking spine, nervous system, brain, bones, and everything in between right down to eyelashes and fingerprints. I feel very clever. I’ve always admired and respected the human body. But us women, holy smokes, we are special. We create life. That simple fact makes me gush with gratitude and awe.
4) My beautiful body.
Yes my thighs are getting bigger. So are my boobs and my belly. But I’ve never felt more sexy and beautiful. Cliché? Perhaps… but it’s a cliché for a reason. I feel ‘bountiful’… tribal. My husband thinks so too.
5) Surrender + self-love.
I think I’m getting this more and more. I’ve always had the ability to push past my boundaries. But, over the last few years surrender and self-love have slowly revealed themselves to me like a curtain drawing back. I’ve had many experiences of both and they are now part of my daily life. I make time for self-love and I consciously surrender. But now, oh wow… this baby demands a softness and an inner strength that has nothing to do with brute force or control.
6) The Collective Baby-love.
I am astounded, daily, but the expressions of joy and gratitude that I receive from complete strangers. There is this innate understanding that ripples through humanity which speaks of the powerful respect for life that we all have. Even if we don’t express it in those words. We are ALL for life. And babies represent that. They also represent a soulful connection to the divine. They are miraculous and yet a normal occurrence. It’s like our own personal god-like encounter that happens over and over. It is actually so humbling to see how people react and to realise that this is not ‘my baby’ but another special gift from the universe to human-kind.
7) The spiritual super-highway
I feel like I’m fast-tracking my spiritual education. I’ve been on my own journey of self-exploration and spiritual seeking for years now, but in the last 20 weeks I can sense a deeper knowing, or shall I say living from TRUST and LOVE. There’s no time to muck around. I’m birthing a life and a mother, it’s truly time to step up to the plate and get super cosy with my soul and to live from it daily. And my soul is telling me to trust. And with that so much irrelevant crap is falling away. I am actually struggling to notice anything ‘wrong’ in my life. Anything I once fretted over is totally irrelevant.
8) Glossy hair. Great skin. Strong nails.
On a more superficial front…I know a lot of this will do a complete about face post-birth (I hear of hair loss, ageing skin and brittle nails) but right now I’m digging this and will be grateful for it for however long it lasts.
9) My little babe…
Last but not least, the little soul that chose my and my husband is doing a splendid job of growing its gorgeous little body. Not to mention the little punches and kicks that started at 18weeks, on the dot. You beautiful little being… I love you so and you make this pregnancy out-of-this-world beautiful.
There you have it, my loves. This, to date, is my beautiful pregnancy. There is more to come I am sure. Right now, there is an energy of inner strength and outer softness brewing inside me that is nothing I’ve ever experienced and I know that’s going to get stronger… I can’t wait to share more with you soon!
Your turn: Share with me something you remember or are experiencing now from your own beautiful pregnancy?
Love + light,
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