Blog

Category: Pregnancy


Episode #28: It’s time to rewrite our birth story

Episode #28: It’s time to rewrite our birth story

Posted April 17, 2018

Episode #28: It’s time to rewrite our birth story At 41 weeks pregnant birth is definitely imminent and on my mind. To say I am excited to experience birth again is an understatement. But I know many women don’t feel that way. Why? I believe it comes back to our beliefs and feelings around birth – our personal birth story – and the collective story we are fed from a very young age. It’s hard to feel positive about something when you’ve only ever heard, read, witnessed birth via FEAR. Negative portrayals, birth wrapped in intervention and an image of it as horrendous, painful and brutal experience. Today’s episode is all about inspiring YOU (as a woman, a mama, a future birther) to rewrite the story around birth. Not just for yourself but for your children, and the next generation. Otherwise we are going to continue to push birth into the shadows and allow it to shrink away when it should be the most powerful, praised and deeply celebrated experience a woman gets the privilege to undergo! In this episode I cover: My personal birth story My mother’s stories on birth A 16 year old’s thoughts on natural child birth Why we need to rewrite our individual and collective birth story How to find new language and stories on birth Listen to this episode: Previous episodes that relate to birth: How to have a Beautiful, Spirited Birth with Lauren Falconer Babies before birth with Maryanne Sea Resources: My Birth Blog posts Soleil’s birth – Part 1 and Part 2 Birth Story Documentary Birth Time Documentary Dr Sarah Buckley Ina May Gaskin Subscribe on iTunes Click here to subscribe on iTunes and never miss an episode! +++ Feel free to comment and share below – does this reader question resonate with you? P.s if you loved this episode, don’t forget to give this podcast a 5-star review in iTunes so I can keep on bringing you amazing interviews, insights and chats. love + light, Claire Read more

Episode 27: Babies before birth – a discovery of healing and magnifying the love with Maryanne Sea

Episode 27: Babies before birth – a discovery of healing and magnifying the love with Maryanne Sea

Posted April 03, 2018

Episode 27: Babies before birth – a discovery of healing and magnifying the love with Maryanne Sea Many of us on this spiritual pathway are passionate about our own healing – or supporting others in there healing. But have you ever considered that perhaps a baby, growing in utero, also may need healing? This is precisely what the incredible guest on today’s episode – Maryanne Sea – does. An incredible intuitive, she works closely with mamas and their unborn babies to facilitate any healing (if needed at all). I have been blessed to work with Maryanne in these last few weeks before bub arrived. A gift like no other to connect with our baby, to create a flow of love, deep healing and open the pathway between the other realm and earth side. We’ve also been able to chat about names for bub, get a strong feel for his personality and fall in love with each other, even more. This conversation with Maryanne is a mix – learn about Maryanne’s mind-blowing wellness journey and recovery, how she discovered her incredible skill for going INTO a person’s body (inner psyche, sub consciousness mind, programming, beliefs and more) as well as the importance and power of magnifying love (the purpose of this life, no?!) You will also learn about how Maryanne connects with and tunes into babies and offer deep healing before bub arrives earth side. Not to mention that Maryanne is an incredible storyteller. You will just get lost listening to her! She’s equal parts humble, deeply generous and loving and yet so intelligent, honest and a true guide and leader. You will love this interview and Maryanne. Oh and PS you will hear the sex of my little bubba during our chat too! Listen to the end! Maryanne’s Bio: Maryanne Sea has wanted to help people since she was a little girl. However, she has had to actually spent most of her life helping herself. Labelled “permanently and totally disabled” by the US government at age 27, she was one of the first people to be challenged by Environmental Illness. In order to recover from her extreme sensitivity to much of what is part of modern life, she had to live in a “bubble” – a room free of all chemical exposures. Her recovery spanned three decades and during this time she immersed herself in a holistic understanding of her condition and developed her intuition to help herself heal. When she re-entered the world, she began teaching courses in holistic healing, including a popular Intuition in Healing course to nurses, doctors  as well as to the general public. She is the past Coordinator of the MindBody Healing course in the Master’s in Wellness program at RMIT University.  At one point during her healing journey, she prayed that her sensitivity could be turned into something that would help people, and that prayer was answered when she discovered that she could use her sensitivity to help others heal and grow. She has offered Intuitive Readings to people in many different countries for the last thirty years. Presently, she is working on a book about her Intuitive Readings with babies before birth. She holds a Master’s Degree in Social Work from the University of Michigan, USA. In this episode we cover: Maryanne’s personal journey of healing from Environmental Illness How Maryanne became a powerful intuitive and healer The way Maryanne uses her unique gift How information doesn’t heal, but intimacy does. When we heal ourselves we can be present to heal others. The ultimate goal when doing a reading/healing. The somatic (body-oriented) focus in Maryanne’s work. The difference between expansion and contraction in the body’s tissue. When a wound or trauma is not released the body will lock it in its own tissue. Maryanne’s own pre-birth experience. What Maryanne experiences when doing a reading. How Maryanne first began doing readings with babies, in utero. Why it’s important to magnify the love and create healing with babies in utero The role that the mother’s story, personal blocks/challenges/ or current circumstances can be affecting the baby? Real life stories of readings with babies in utero and the healing that unfolding Maryanne’s summary of the reading she did with my baby and what healing was needed. The purpose and experience of connecting with and healing babies in utero. How important it is to magnify the love between baby, mama and papa before birth. Maryanne’s personal mission A discounted offer to mamas to work with Maryanne closely. Listen to this episode: Connect with Maryanne Web As mentioned in our interview Maryanne has created a HEAVILY discounted package if you’d like to work with her. Please get in touch with her via email to discuss. seamaryanne@gmail.com If you are pregnant or even if your bub is born I cannot recommend working with Maryanne enough. It’s been SUCH a pleasure, a gift and true awakening. You can download this PDF on Maryanne’s offering – two readings that I think are stupidly affordable! +++ Feel free to comment and share below. How do you feel about death? P.s if you loved this episode, don’t forget to give this podcast a 5-star review in iTunes so I can keep on bringing you amazing interviews, insights and chats. I’d be so grateful to receive your feedback and comments, whatever they may be. love + light, Claire Read more

Episode #21: My pregnancy journey in mind, body and soul

Episode #21: My pregnancy journey in mind, body and soul

Posted February 20, 2018

Episode #21: My pregnancy journey in mind-body-soul I decided it was time to share some detail on my current pregnancy and what has been unfolding for me soulfully and spiritually. As well as what I’ve been doing to support my body and detox my mind through such a huge transformation. I go into detail about what I’ve been eating, supplementing, how I’ve been moving, what I’m personally working on and experiencing. This is simply just to shine a light on the pregnancy journey and honour the process to hopefully give you some insight and support too. In this episode I cover: What I am doing to support my mind, body and soul during this pregnancy (and last!) The truth about pregnancy – let’s get real! My personal philosophy when it comes to pregnancy Honouring the challenges Why I disconnect from social media during early pregnancy Why it’s OK to feel resentment or unhappiness whilst being pregnant The ongoing lesson of surrender during pregnancy A look at nutrition, movement, supplements Why I believe it’s crazy not to supplement! Intuitive and compassionate movement versus rigid and structured exercise How this is different from my first pregnancy The energy I feel during pregnancy My experience with low iron The way I am moving my body and the challenges I’ve faced with exercising Birth Planning and preparation What I’ve been personally working on when it comes to mindset and post-birth Why you need to work on cleansing and releasing limiting beliefs, blocks, expectations and negative thought patterns My new Mama Coaching Program to help you do the work to be the mama you want to be (see below for more information!) How I didn’t plan this pregnancy but what it’s brought me The deep soul work that has been unfolding The space of transition I am in Pregnancy intuition and the channel that opens up How your baby and pregnancy is integral to your soul journey + deliverance of your inner truth Listen to the episode Show notes: My resources + offerings Get my ebook: The Bump – Pregnancy Wellness eGuide Listen to my podcast episode on Navigating Transitions with Rachel Macdonald Om Mama Love – Online  meditation, mindfulness and self-love membership for mamas  Information on my Coaching Mama Program – Birthing The Mama You Desire To Be Birth support/information Lauren Falconer/Spirit Birth Sarah Buckley Ina May Gaskin Subscribe on iTunes Click here to subscribe on iTunes and never miss an episode! +++ Feel free to comment and share below – has this episode supported you (during or as you plan a pregnancy?) P.s if you loved this episode, don’t forget to give this podcast a 5-star review in iTunes so I can keep on bringing you amazing interviews, insights and chats. love + light, Claire Love + light, Claire x Read more

Audio Blog: A simple practice to help you fall in love with your body

Audio Blog: A simple practice to help you fall in love with your body

Posted July 27, 2017

Falling in love with your body I’m not going to sugar coat this. Falling in love with my ‘new’ body since becoming a mama is something I have to work at. There are softer, stretched bits. Jiggly bit. Wider bits. All ‘bits’ I didn’t have before. Throw in LIFE and not as much time as I used to and the result is a woman working out less, eating differently and looking very differently too. Yes, I’ve gone from a size 6, toned, yogi body, to a size 8. Softer. More womanly. And definitely still healthy and strong. Nothing to complain about, but nevertheless it’s been a shock. It was a surprise when I realised, two years later that I STILL couldn’t fit into 95% of my old clothes. It was a surprise when I saw pictures of myself and almost said “who’s that?” It is still a surprise when I do a headstand in yoga and I can feel the weight of my stretched belly dropping down. But more than that, it’s a surprise to hear myself talk about my body negatively, out loud. How cruel (and not OK!) to speak so harshly about this divine vessel that gives me the chance to have such a brilliant human experience. Including the miracle of creating, birthing and nurturing life. So, beautiful women (and I hope a few good men too!) this audio blog is for you. It was for me too. And it’s not just for mamas. It’s for ALL women who have every spoken, felt, thought RUDE and degrading thoughts about their own divine bodies. love + light, Claire xx Read more

Find Your Tribe

Find Your Tribe

Posted May 24, 2016

It’s time to find your tribe. Find your collective, your crew. Connection is a deep soul craving that will nourish and cradle you. This is the message my base chakra kept sending me. Granted, my base chakra needed a lot of work after pregnancy and birth and a key element to rebuilding my base chakra was to really zone in on the areas I most felt depleted in. Or where I felt ‘lack’ or weakness. Through meditation and self-reflection married with my understanding of what the base chakra represents I came to truly know what was needed to rebuild this vital, foundational energy centre. Amongst the mess of my finances, career, feeling grounding, home life and structure the stand out was finding and being part of a tribe. They say it takes a village to raise a child and I now know that to be the most on-point statement around motherhood ever. For many of us we don’t have that village vibe. You might not live close to your family. Or perhaps, like me, you do live very close but for various reasons you can’t lean on them as much as you want to. Or perhaps they don’t quite satisfy you on a soul level. Gratefully, as I worked on rebuilding my base chakra through meditation and energy work, my base started working for me. Calling in situations, circumstances, people to guide me home to my tribe. The importance of connection As I’ve shared many times before, the first 3-4 months of Soleil’s life was so challenging it truly catapulted me into a different space, time, dimension. [BTW if you want to hear more about those early months of mama hood for me, head HERE to listen to my podcast interview with Amy Taylor-Kabbaz] It was this cataclysmic, seismic shift that drew me into an isolated bubble. I wasn’t able to make it to Mother’s Group for months. My parents were away overseas for 3 months. My sisters were busy with their children and fighting virus after virus – which meant I couldn’t see them for most of last winter. One day, I had 30 minutes to myself so I headed straight down to the beach for a walk. I spotted a mother’s group and something dragged me over to them. Their babies looked the same age as Soleil. And despite the tears literally welling up in my eyes and jamming my throat I gingerly approached them. Now, if you know me well enough by now you’ll probably balk at the idea that I did anything ‘gingerly’… it’s not my style at all. I’m more the direct/opinionated/confident type (with a decent helping of introvert thrown into the mix). But, as described I was isolated, all out of whack energetically and in a really dark place. So gingerly, nervously, is how I approached these beautiful women. They saw me coming. They smiled over at me. All the while I was thinking ‘Claire, what are you doing?!’… and yet I was propelled forward, my feet moved, my voice opened and I started talking… I mumbled something about never being able to attend Mother’s Group. I quickly shared that Soleil was a very unsettled baby but I’d love to come to the next meet-up. These women looked liked they had their shit together – a big leap from where I was in that moment. And it terrified me – comparisonitis kicked in, but yet still… I kept going. Something greater than me with more knowing powered through me in that moment. They were so warm. So loving. So gracious and patient. Many months later I personally thanked one of those mamas who, particularly, had been so inviting and compassionate to me. She told me that she saw how broken I was but she was impressed that I had reached out to them. That meant a lot to me – to know that she could really ‘see’ me in that moment and chose to respond from her heart. This Mother’s Group became the beginning of a massive realisation. It was my base chakra that dragged me over to them – to give me a taste of what sisterhood felt like. To remind me that sharing experiences and connection was vital to my soul happiness.  I did my best to attend these groups weekly and the women were (are!) all incredible, loving and straight-up good eggs. But there was something missing for me, although I never placed my finger on it. Find Your Tribe It wasn’t until one late winter’s day that I took Soleil out, in the ergo baby, for a walk to a local cafe. Underneath this beautiful little oasis of trees I passed by another mama carrying her hub. We smiled at each other. And just as we were about to pass each other, her beautiful bubba and my little sunbeam reached out to each other. Those little, chubby fingers stretching out wanting to grab hold of each other. They kicked and giggled. We practically did the same. The connection was and still is real. Myself and this other mama stood there chatting in the way that only mamas do. Hurried, excited, jumping from one thing to another in an effort to learn and absorb as much of each other as possible. It’s almost like speed-dating. 3 minutes to decide (before your babies start whinging to move on) if this woman is your type of mama. I knew instantly – she intrigued me. She is so different to me yet so aligned. We exchanged numbers. And from that day on I bumped into her and saw her everywhere. We eventually found a groove and started catching up with mama/baby play dates. Not long after that in late spring down at the beach with countless babies and mamas at the kids pool I found myself talking to one particular mama. I trust my intuition implicitly and on reflection I can see again how I was sub consciously gravitating towards certain energies. This mama is into health, wellness, spirituality. She is so generous – […] Read more

Crossing over from the head to the heart

Crossing over from the head to the heart

Posted June 08, 2015

Crossing over from the head to the heart Over a year ago, maybe more, I had an astrology reading done by the incredible Ezzie Spencer. Ezzie did my full chart and then talked me through what she had discovered. It’s funny, at the time I found everything she said to be fully loaded and heavy with meaning, but didn’t realise what the process would be when her discoveries came into being. Besides identifying that I am triple Aquarian, with my sun, moon and rising star seated in this fixed air sign, she also revealed something quite powerful and profound. This ‘something’ is only now coming into fruition, but looking back I can see it has been slowly brewing for years. I’ve been blindly and without direction travelling towards this something. ++ Ezzie pointed out that I have an astute level of understanding and a deep well of wisdom. All of this is cradled by a refined intellect and analytical mind. Ha! Gosh that sounds conceited… What that really means is that I’m all ‘in the head’! I’m a sensitive being, highly tuned in and self aware, but what comes naturally is using my mind, my intellect to ‘understand’. I’m a thinker and used to really pride myself for it. You with me so far? I bet many of you might resonate with this, so let me flesh it out a little more: Do you feel you are quick to understand BIG concepts? Is it easy for you to see all sides to a story/situation? Can you clearly ‘get’ spiritual teachings? Do you usually find it’s a no brainer when wrapping your head around complex people/issues/experiences? Can you easily deduce ways through sticky and cloudy experiences? Do you tend to be the voice of reason and insight amongst your family and friends? Is your wisdom often based on what you’ve experienced or come to learn rather than what you feel and intuit? Are you mostly driven and guided by your head? Are you often in your head – thinking and planning and stewing? Yes? Are you with me or know someone that is just like this? ++ Ok, first up, to clarify: there is nothing wrong with being this way. Being a heady, ‘thinker’ type has its benefits. Switched on and clued up! If you are this way, more power to you. We need thinkers! ++ When Ezzie pointed this out to me she explained that my soul had lived from this heady, wise space for countless lives. So far, it has supported me just fine. But now, in this lifetime and for the first lifetime ever, I am being called to cross the ravine and make it to the other side. To move away from the head space! And what awaits me there? A life led by the heart. A life dropped into an intuitive, feeling based space. Over the last five years I’ve journeyed deeper into my spiritual pilgrimage and explored deeply in my work as a Mind-Body-Soul coach. This continual process of discovery has slowly brought me face to face with the limitations of living from my head. It’s also forced me many times to feel into my heart and live from there. Many times I’ve resisted – after all, it’s new and scary and hard. Living from my head is easy. I’ve done it for many lives. It seems clear cut, straightforward; though truthfully it’s the opposite! But often I’ve not been given a choice, and my latest dalliance with feeling, living and being from my heart is one of those choice-less experiences. Becoming a mother is, I can now see, the true beginning of my traverse from the head side to the heart side. I’ve begun the journey, crossing the ravine. I know now that the last few years have been prepping me, slowly, for this forced, cataclysmic trek down deep into my feeling centre, into my soul, a trip that has been written into my soul’s story well before this body existed. ++ Every day, this motherhood gig requires me to check my ego and my intellect at the door. I’m asked to feel into my baby and her needs, to intuit them. I’m asked to feel into my body and be with whatever discomfort lives there in a much more potent way than before – yet also to respect and love this body more than ever, despite the fact that it’s more worn and battle torn! I’m asked daily to let my heart be centre stage, in order to navigate from soul. I’m asked to stop and drop the ongoing mind-chatter and useless need to ‘understand’. I’m asked to be ok with not ‘getting it’ and to stay out of my head. I’m ask to give and give fully in the NOW and to do so gratefully and with joy, to feel good giving more than I thought I was capable of. Oh it’s so easy to write those words, yet this is the most challenging spiritual assignment to date. Don’t for a second think that I’ve nailed this or that I easily can do what’s being asked of me. Feeling. Feel. Feel it… Do you know how to sit with what you feel and tune into it from an emotional space not an intellectual space? ‘Do you know’… That’s how I just started that question! It’s so ironic, considering we are talking about feeling, which, of itself, has nada to do with ‘knowing’… Feeling and living from that space is so damn challenging because we can’t study it and figure it out. We simply have to throw ourselves into the firey pit of feeling over and over and over until our mind starts to get the idea and turns down its full ball volume. This is where I am right now: being ok with not knowing what I feel, but also going there despite the struggle, as often as I can. This means so many different things. It means, as a person, I’m […] Read more

The Story of Soleil’s Birth Part 2

The Story of Soleil’s Birth Part 2

Posted June 01, 2015

The Story of Soleil’s Birth Part 2 If you missed out on Part 1 of this story please CLICK here to catch-up. ++ So, we left off at the point where my waters had broken yet labour had still not kicked in. My induction date was set and there was no going back. At this point I was accepting of the situation. It felt weird to ‘know’ the due date of my baby – the lack of randomness felt odd and overly planned to me, but nevertheless I was ready and this was happening and I’d finally let go of the fears I didn’t even know I had! On the morning of March 5th my husband and I pottered around the house, packed the car and had a beautiful breakfast together. Once at the hospital we set about making our room more comfortable. I put on a playlist I had created, started burning some ‘surrender’ oil and hung up the prayer flags my ladies had made me at my blessing way ceremony. We closed off the curtains to all the unnecessary medical equipment and dimmed the lights. Immediately the room felt calmer with a focused energy holding the space. Myself, Chris, my midwife and my doula spent time chatting and warming up to each other…warming up to the journey ahead. There was laughter and lightness – exactly what I had hoped for. At 11:30 I was administered the syntocinin – synthetic oxytocin to jump start the surges and get labour going. I was warned it can sometimes take a while to kick in with new mums… but not this mama! In less than two hours I was feeling my first ‘real’ surges, although I was still able to crack jokes in between. Within an hour I was plunged into the surreal ‘here and there’ space that comes with the intensity of full-blown labour. Naked. Swaying. Body rolling. I stood beneath the shower, feeling the hot water ease the aches and tingles that radiated from head to toe with each contraction. My body and my baby bearing down, earthbound, to open and release. There was no time for airs and graces. This was not the time for self consciousness or insecurity. There I was, out in the open. All woman. Moaning and rocking and breathing through it all, one moment and a time. Each surge, each contraction felt like a tidal wave rolling through my body… building in intensity and taking me with it. I found myself vocalising the intensity and loudly moaning and ‘omming’ through each wave. I had always imagined I would be very quiet and inward, but in the end I was very vocal – my inner warrior loudly took over. Now, I don’t want to use the word pain here — after all pain is dependant on how you perceive it – but there were moments when the sensations were so overwhelming, I felt overtaken by them. I found myself quietly repeating ‘it’s not pain, only a new sensation’ in order to stay present and ride the peak of the surge… and as I descended towards the end of each surge, my breathing would slow down, my attention would move deeper inward and my body and mind would move into stillness. I would stay here for what felt like mere moments, but in actual fact were minutes, between each surge. And then, once again, the wave would rebuild. My Doula, Lauren Falconer, and my husband were integral in supporting me through each surge… massaging me, hydrating me, wiping my face with a cold cloth, whispering supportive words… I felt held and completely able to surrender to the intensity knowing I had the most loving team backing me. It also allowed me to do what I feel every woman needs to do – let go of the outside world, of dealing with questions and concerns from the hospital or even worrying about time… I was able to let the beast of birth consume me and take me into it’s deep dark belly. If I clicked into my analytical, left brain I would start to question my abilty, my resolve or even the possibility that I could cope with this experience. But truthfully, when I stepped away from that headspace and stayed connected to my heart, my feeling space, my own inner wisdom, I knew I could do it. The most astounding thing that I can now see in retrospect is a birthing mother’s ability to be clear about what she wants and needs with diamond clarity – there was no confusion about what I required nor any fussing about in asking for me. Water. Massage. Be quiet. Hold my hand. I found myself almost barking orders to my team – something more powerful had taken over ensuring that we (my body, my baby and I) had exactly what we needed to move through each stage. I was also hyper vigilant… if anything happened that I felt unsure about or that sent shivers of insecurity through my body, I was onto it. At one point I saw Chris leave the room and I couldn’t settle until he had returned. I heard myself say on repeat “Where is Chris. Is he coming back?” I later learned that my beautiful mother, who was restlessly waiting for news at home, decided to show up at the delivery suite. Chris had been called out to see her! Probably not the best time to come, eh mum! ++ Ok…So there I was, deep in established labour and I intuitively had this feeling that my body was opening quickly. I asked my midwife when she was planning on checking my cervix for dilation – I had previously indicated that I wanted minimal interference including cervical checks. At this point it was 4pm and my midwife indicated she wasn’t going to check me until 7pm. Upon hearing that I almost fell apart. I now realise I was overcome with fear for a moment. Labour had become so intense I was starting to question my […] Read more

The Story of Soleil’s Birth Part 1

The Story of Soleil’s Birth Part 1

Posted May 25, 2015

The Story of Soleil’s Birth Part 1 Bringing Soleil into the world… It’s been 11 weeks since Soleil was born, to the day (as I write this), and it’s taken me this long to write and share with you our birth story. It’s partly taken me this long to process the birth and also to simply find the time to write this epic story. I want to share this story simply because I truly believe child birth (however it happens, including caesarean) is a miraculous, powerful experience… and within that experience holds the opportunity for deep transformation and growth. It tests you – even just thinking about it – to your limits. It is the birthing of my child, earth angel that she is, and then e birthing of me as a mother. We (baby and me) are both equally important in this birthing process… working together. I remember saying to my husband, two weeks before giving birth and just after experiencing quite an intense practice contraction, that I could see that labour was going to require ALL of me. What did I mean by ALL of me? My body – and all its strength My mind – and its ability to focus My heart – staying open and trusting My soul – remaining fearless and connected to purpose And, well, it did. I had to throw ALL of me into the birth, not to mention the days and weeks following… Soleil’s birthing truly brought me to my knees (literally!) and cracked me open (oh yeah, literally too!). So, let me start with a little background insight first on my child birth… The question I asked myself frequently in the early days of pregnancy was, ‘What kind of birth did I want?’ And I use the word ‘want’ loosely because there is no way to plan something so out of our control. What I hoped for, what I intended and what I preferred to happen was this: A natural, drug-free birth. A birth without unnecessary intervention A chance to bond with my baby post-birth for as long as possible A loving experience – surrounded by supportive people who understand me A birth that happened spontaneously A safe, healthy, quick experience A divine, empowering experience A birth peppered with humour and love. Add to that smaller desires, such as not managing the third stage of labour (cutting and clamping the umbilical cord too soon) or speeding up the release of the placenta. Well, the universe gave me some of what I wanted but threw in a few curve balls for good measure. Yes, they tested me, yes, they threw me off course, but they also provided the chance to completely surrender, to drop my agendas and expectations and to leave my ego at the door. One such test was being two weeks overdue. I was due on the 19th of February but bub arrived two weeks late on the 5th of March. I was (mostly) enjoying my pregnancy – as much as is possible when you are 17kgs heavier, filled with fluid, waddling and sleeping poorly. Despite that, I didn’t feel rushed to ‘get to the end’. It was a glorious summer of daily swims, outdoor yoga and lots of quality time with my husband. I meditated two or three times a day, my journal was my confidant and I ate delicious home cooked meals. I’m so glad I savoured that time because life with a baby definitely doesn’t allow for such indulgence (for now!). During those two weeks over due, my body and mind did a few somersaults, twists and turns. Everyday my body showed signs it was preparing for childbirth – I’ll spare you the graphic details but suffice to say it was ‘on’ – but it was turning on slowly. My little Soleil seemed reluctant to complete her journey to this earthly plane. She knew it was time, I did too, but there was some resistance from both of us. I knew she was coming but I could feel she wanted to come on her terms. In the near future I’ll share about Soleil’s first ‘cranio sacral’ therapy session where we discovered she felt the need to be ‘reborn’ and make peace with how she was birthed. ++ The conversation on ‘induction’ began with my midwives at exactly 40 weeks. That’s what happens when you hit your due date, not to mention when you are nearing 42 weeks gestation! I wouldn’t say I felt pressured, but when you are part of the modern hospital system you are often burdened with scary statistics and fear tactics. It’s hard to hold your ground… I wanted to go past 42 weeks but I faced a big fight to make that happen, which I didn’t have in me. I’m going to be completely honest here and say I had such resistance to being induced. I ‘knew’ too much about what can happen with an induction – often it leads to an epidural because the contractions are too intense (apparently much stronger that a spontaneous birth) and often that then leads to a caesarean because labour can dramatically slow down with pain relief. To add to that, at 27 I was my sister’s birth partner. She was induced and it was a horribly quick, intense, dramatic and very messy experience. So, I had a (huge) stigma attached to induction to say the least. The more the ‘induction’ word was thrown around, the more my resistance and internal fears boiled up. I spent hours daily journalling, meditating and reflecting on these feelings. 
Why did it matter so much to me? What was I really afraid of – the induction itself or the fact that it wasn’t a ‘spontaneous’ birth? How could I drop this story and embrace a new one? Is it possible for this to be beautiful? Is it possible for me to drop all judgment and therefore all anxiety? I also spent a lot of time conversing with bubby, mostly inviting her into […] Read more

The story of Soleil…

The story of Soleil…

Posted April 28, 2015

The story of Soleil… My little light beam, my daughter – Soleil Margarita Rivera – was born on the 5th of March 2015 at 6:43pm after what can only be described as an EPIC birth at lightening speed. But before I share with you my very personal and precious birth story I want to dial back a little to the beginning. Soleil is an earth angel that has been with me (energetically) for many years before she actually graced this earthly plane. Let’s start some 18 years ago. Yes, that’s how very long ago this love story began. This is the story of Soleil and how she came into my world. This story is also about signs. Noticing the little winks and directions from the universe. It’s about trusting in something you can’t see or confirm in anyway. It’s all about following your intuition. So, back we go, 18 years…I can’t remember why but I remember one morning, dressed in my bonds chesty singlet and pyjama shorts (standard sleepwear for my 15 year old self), I entered the kitchen and sat down. My mum was there… I looked up at her and said “Mum, I don’t know why but I think one day I’m going to have a little girl, and her name is going to be Soleil.” My Mum, who speaks French, knew immediately that Soleil meant Sun. And she too, in that moment, felt what I felt – that I was speaking a truth from an unknown source of wisdom. I remember her saying… “Oh that is beautiful. Your little sunshine. Of course you will. Inshallah (God’s will).” So there she was. Little Soleil had shown up, just like that, and made a home within my heart. And the idea that she would one day be in my life… well, I felt and believed this to my core. I trusted in this so much so that on my very first date with Chris, right after I realised that I would be marrying this man one day (I knew this in the same way I knew that Tuesday follows Monday) I shared with him about my unborn daughter, Soleil. And, no he didn’t freak out (tick!) Fast forward 7 years. I was 22 and travelling in Thailand and I wanted to get a tattoo… flicking through a book of tattoo suggestions in a bamboo shack on a remote beach, I remember thinking that the Sun and the Ocean were two of my greatest loves. As I thought that I glanced down and saw a word, written in Arabic Script (a touchstone to my heritage), with the translation written underneath – that word was ‘Soleil’… I decided on that tattoo instantly. Jump forward again to age 32… Chris, my husband, and I were celebrating our wedding with a belated honeymoon in Thailand. We had loosely discussed that starting a family might be on the cards soon, but we both still felt nervous about jumping in… As if we had any control over what the universe was dishing up for us?! Within a few days of our trip I noticed my period was late. After taking a test it was confirmed that yes, we truly have NO control. A little bub had found its way into my body and into our lives. As we walked the beach trying to process this HUGE change in our lives we glanced up and saw a restaurant (that we had passed countless times and never noticed) named Soleil. Chris and I both got goosebumps – the usual way my intuition tweaks like a puppy dogs ears, pricking up to a distant unheard sound. To drive the message home, that evening, at dinner, we sat near a German family – two little girls ran around in circles. The eldest calling out to her sister to follow her…. ‘Soleil, Soleil!” And this was on the very same where I first had that tattoo done. I couldn’t quite believe I was hearing this – a name I’d never heard before was now being sang around me… two little girls once again hammering the point home, that Soleil had decided now was the time. ++ As the pregnancy progressed I was ambushed (lovingly) with people’s opinions – It’s a boy, you’re carrying like a boy! Often other people’s intuition was so strong that it swayed me… including my husband who insisted it was a boy! So I started to wonder – am I having a boy? Could Soleil be taking a little longer to show up? But every time I would go off track a little signpost would redirect me back home to the truth… One day I was handed a gift from a family friend, filled with boy’s clothes. The bag they were in? A Cirque du Soleil bag. The day before I went into labour, Chris and I went for a spectacular sunrise walk on the beach. As I watched the fiery, bold, powerful sun rise over the ocean I couldn’t hold back the tears… as I realised my own Soleil was rising up, and getting ready to beam her light into my heart. I asked for the universe to send me a sign – to show me a Lady Bug (in the flesh, a picture, drawing, whatever!) And the signs kept coming…I had written in my journal, asking the universe to send a sign that Soleil was coming. I asked for two clear signs – anything fish related (as I was certain the baby was to be born a Pisces) and Ladybugs! One beautiful Sunday when I went to meet a friend, a Lady Bug flew at me and landed on my arm. This same friend had also told me she’d had a premonition it was a girl. That night as Chris walked into the kitchen I heard, “Claire, come here….” and there she was again, another ladybug sitting on the wall. My doula was in a bookstore and happened upon a random book with a HUGE picture of a […] Read more


Join The Wellness Project

Get free weekly insights & inspiration
  • Get your FREE ebook: 21 Days to Free Your Mind, Fuel Your Body & Feed Your Soul